tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4724159391245803002024-03-19T14:39:15.031-07:00Check Your Calculators at the DoorAlynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.comBlogger91125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-63163939069603949912017-03-01T11:40:00.000-08:002017-03-01T11:40:08.786-08:00Grocery Shopping on a Budget
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">A couple weeks ago, a group of us sat down and talked
personal budgeting.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Some of the girls
were impressed that I budget only $600 a month for groceries for a family of
4.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So today I wanted to talk about my grocery
shopping process.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">First up, have a budget and stick to it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I grocery shop once a week, so I have
$150/week to spend on groceries.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Next step, is you need to plan.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Planning is key to this whole process.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I first start with a weekly meal plan.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>By doing this, I am focusing on what I need
to buy for my meals, eliminating putting extra “stuff” on my grocery list –
essentially buying what you need.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This
consists of going through my cupboards/fridge/freezers to see what I have
available, in conjunction with looking through flyers to see what “deals” are
on this week.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have been at this for a while
and pay attention to prices so I know what I am willing to pay for items and I
also have comparison shopped between stores.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I do try to buy certain items at Walmart and Costco because I have done
my research, I am that person with their calculator out at Costco looking at
the cost/unit and comparing to pictures of prices I have previously taken at
other grocery stores and compare costs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>However,
I also do not have time to go to 3 different places to grocery shop per
week.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So I keep a list of stuff that I
am getting low on where I know significant savings can be made at
Costco/Walmart and will buy on the next Costco run, and try to incorporate my
meal plan to not include those items if I can’t make it there for a couple
weeks.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhc5OHWWegUguyvVywA1rXyv0bFLjsaTAAjAEiSuLn7FYuZfd7PP0xeFitDwVVXQK_Ax4wvm6FKfvFDUg-NvUti-r3UfxTD4PBuKYOb5aiZPczG9jKgI6SpCtQ-p0QraCsXDq2Zrx9uHfU5/s1600/Grocery+Flyers.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhc5OHWWegUguyvVywA1rXyv0bFLjsaTAAjAEiSuLn7FYuZfd7PP0xeFitDwVVXQK_Ax4wvm6FKfvFDUg-NvUti-r3UfxTD4PBuKYOb5aiZPczG9jKgI6SpCtQ-p0QraCsXDq2Zrx9uHfU5/s400/Grocery+Flyers.JPG" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Comparison Pricing</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjtcSRi4aHF9jfXBSPgqjpPUBZhP-dKKijJYCw0ook7jZAiIUyV6_ULrvngGLdjaBfMg50-ZRrgrNC0vCQif9RXITN004Xb-PRJCJA7kRjXGPHf9kmgHw9RDbeJVvEUIu0i_BUewpRmxYf/s1600/list.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjtcSRi4aHF9jfXBSPgqjpPUBZhP-dKKijJYCw0ook7jZAiIUyV6_ULrvngGLdjaBfMg50-ZRrgrNC0vCQif9RXITN004Xb-PRJCJA7kRjXGPHf9kmgHw9RDbeJVvEUIu0i_BUewpRmxYf/s640/list.JPG" width="480" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The List</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDHmxpQOT0hm6YOenKGeVgp3hRwIModFNgZrBJZG8_JQr_C8Z3-ZSKqZmt1TyDfhvrDR509XJUEqLsrOoMfJcG48H0Soli6qSxqM16rIOUbVcQWx8pN1TXUnvEm3A06Y750uP3JXl4VS5L/s1600/meal+plan.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDHmxpQOT0hm6YOenKGeVgp3hRwIModFNgZrBJZG8_JQr_C8Z3-ZSKqZmt1TyDfhvrDR509XJUEqLsrOoMfJcG48H0Soli6qSxqM16rIOUbVcQWx8pN1TXUnvEm3A06Y750uP3JXl4VS5L/s640/meal+plan.JPG" width="480" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A little messy, but none the less it is a meal plan</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Ok, so here is an example of my meal planning process for
this particular week.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> Some of the meat I have in my freezer is</span> a moose roast, shrimp,
elk hamburger and elk steaks.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>That is my meat for four meals this week.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Whole chickens were on sale at Safeway and I
was happy with the price (compared it to Walmart), so that is another
meal.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I will have chicken left over so I
will make a chicken salad for lunch the next day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I always have veggies left over at the end of
the week so I will make a stir-fry.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As I
am planning out my meals, I am making a grocery list.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The list also includes prices beside it, so I
can see at any given time where my numbers are at.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I also look at prices in the flyers.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For example, I may love bananas, but apples
are going to cost me less this week, so apples it is.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Remember, coupons are our friends and pay
attention to deals that your store it putting on.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They may have customer appreciation days (get
10% off your groceries on Tuesdays, spend $100 and get a $10 voucher, etc).</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Once I have my list it is off to the store with my
willingness to stick to it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Temptation
is hard when you grocery shop, then insert shopping with your kids who want
everything.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>What I try to do is explain
we are sticking to the items on the list and I usually say if they help me out grocery
shopping and not ask for things, they can have $2 to spend on something.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This week they wanted donuts for dessert for
supper, and they were delish by the way.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">OK, we are now going through the aisles, and we are paying
attention to prices.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have mushrooms on
my list, so I look at all the different brands of canned mushrooms and go with
the cheapest price.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Some items I just can’t
go with the generic store brand (which is usually the cheaper price), but if
you have no brand/taste attachment go with the cheapest.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is interesting once you start paying
attention to see what the cost variance can be between brands.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Even within brands, like packaging makes a
difference.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>For example, to buy a 1
litre of milk in a plastic container costs more than a 1 litre cardboard
container.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I am also comparing prices on
my list to what I am actually paying so I know I am staying within my total
budget.</span></div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfeCNSPsKeUdAzjJpw64Q51h_uCLJ346vRa9TtY9Y1yK10slknUuPdF0_8KqyfXY1QbyrEmRgNTfG9xXJqwrXfwgjlHCUm7gDuMbYjiNku04PLBhB6Fg9jQz1k0ec0Fc2We8NWBiP7VQgw/s1600/receipt.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfeCNSPsKeUdAzjJpw64Q51h_uCLJ346vRa9TtY9Y1yK10slknUuPdF0_8KqyfXY1QbyrEmRgNTfG9xXJqwrXfwgjlHCUm7gDuMbYjiNku04PLBhB6Fg9jQz1k0ec0Fc2We8NWBiP7VQgw/s400/receipt.JPG" width="300" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My total came to $127, I was even impressed that I came in $1 over my calculated $126</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Again, planning is key because you are limiting your
shopping to what you need.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Planning your
meals also helps you not to eat out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How
many times have you said, I don’t know what to make for supper so lets’ just go
out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You can also get creative and have
fun.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>On this particular meal planning day,
Bentley really wanted to go out for supper.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>We came up with the idea of having a restaurant at our house.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was the cook and she was the waitress.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We made menus, decorated the table and the
men were our customers.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was a lot of
fun!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3Le2FpAu3G2CeeOmZ1mNU3vDpk2jWoiflSqDK3UOyTq01edNO3Lqv7V-QH8SfUJBYRgsuc4hkyeOYddKiQD66vRAHdjdaZhohnsL4tUb-32edGqRAZ_2ZAKI9dTVgC6KulnMTqCUTzstu/s1600/menu.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3Le2FpAu3G2CeeOmZ1mNU3vDpk2jWoiflSqDK3UOyTq01edNO3Lqv7V-QH8SfUJBYRgsuc4hkyeOYddKiQD66vRAHdjdaZhohnsL4tUb-32edGqRAZ_2ZAKI9dTVgC6KulnMTqCUTzstu/s640/menu.JPG" width="480" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKUIzX-xOUVJvckTePFftqZOL1O0ixYjbim2NZceHTnM7j0CFhcDewWrg7kOw4x1zIGLolaPnuCoYOvZ7aUXEybnMkqgZr_na7Mda-hvTuqrZo0LVd7M82ryfCItcmE1g0bsBpCSiBq44z/s1600/Table+setting.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKUIzX-xOUVJvckTePFftqZOL1O0ixYjbim2NZceHTnM7j0CFhcDewWrg7kOw4x1zIGLolaPnuCoYOvZ7aUXEybnMkqgZr_na7Mda-hvTuqrZo0LVd7M82ryfCItcmE1g0bsBpCSiBq44z/s400/Table+setting.JPG" width="300" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPL3rvZSnLGL3kvLhs7CpOoGq_9gi7TbOsrsvP2N6ka9rPJmkU6LeqLhFe88IXn4fEvIwwbM1Xlge4zgw9UBTnchF0H1VXzsSLAVqTD0pWfzrwl2w2o1o2GJJ_GxzAChiUp-SFkrbmNNFd/s1600/waitress.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPL3rvZSnLGL3kvLhs7CpOoGq_9gi7TbOsrsvP2N6ka9rPJmkU6LeqLhFe88IXn4fEvIwwbM1Xlge4zgw9UBTnchF0H1VXzsSLAVqTD0pWfzrwl2w2o1o2GJJ_GxzAChiUp-SFkrbmNNFd/s400/waitress.JPG" width="300" /></a></div>
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Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-31699004075918780702015-08-27T10:35:00.001-07:002015-08-27T10:49:00.768-07:00Second Year AnniversaryI had every intension to write a lovely post to honor my mom on the 2nd anniversary of her death. Unfortunately, this week work got surprisingly busy and I ran out of time. Here is a short post to honor my mom and capture my thoughts.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhsHLjH-kKF2AtlqGOMF8X16bFci18ENQYRfFz81TDM0u-9Fhxa0b3b-Psqfr_o3dWsr32_QMT_NS1zYDJ4zRg1vYmvjTkZSyGiRO1xc3-KCOoXJb3VZODQPW2JKejXddooTaAafPwkQREt/s1600/10377382_1614786898733885_4329620650569075705_n%255B1%255D.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhsHLjH-kKF2AtlqGOMF8X16bFci18ENQYRfFz81TDM0u-9Fhxa0b3b-Psqfr_o3dWsr32_QMT_NS1zYDJ4zRg1vYmvjTkZSyGiRO1xc3-KCOoXJb3VZODQPW2JKejXddooTaAafPwkQREt/s320/10377382_1614786898733885_4329620650569075705_n%255B1%255D.jpg" width="319" /></a></div>
This sums it up. I long to talk to her. I just want to ask how she is doing!!! I miss her voice.<br />
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My good friend Carmen sent me this today. Thanks for this, it is so true.<br />
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Our girls trip starts today, so I will be missing the chance to be with my family for my mom's death anniversary and her birthday on Saturday. My family and Greg and Melayna celebrated her last weekend by having a visit at her memorial tree near the farmers market, followed by a walk along the river.<br />
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Miss you mom. Always in my heart, never forgotten. <br />
<br />
Alynne.<br />
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<br />Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-52081446464462657372015-07-09T11:46:00.001-07:002015-07-09T11:46:40.858-07:00Pinterest - Thanks for Making my Life sooooo NummyI am not the best cook, I started cooking later in life and have had many hard lessons learned. I do really enjoy pinning recipes on Pinterest, some work out, some not-so-much. What makes a recipe a winner in my house, all 4 family members must love it, they finish their meal and request it for supper at a later date. What I particularly look for is a simple, quick to prepare recipe using common ingredients that I usually have in my fridge, and a healthy recipe is a bonus. I also like to prepare meals in double batches so I can freeze one for another time, usually when we have hockey and need a quick eat and go meal. Some of my favorite pins are for my slow cooker, usually a meat, soup or chili.<br />
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Here are two recipes I think you should try. These two picks are inspired by our healthy meal we had last night at Carmen's birthday celebration. My whole family loves them and I am sure you will too!<br />
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1. <a href="http://mycrazylife-lauren.blogspot.ca/2013/03/pinterest-pancakes.html">Biggest Loser Pancakes</a> - these are a healthier version of a pancake and taste like French toast.<br />
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<img alt="Biggest loser oatmeal pancakes. They say... once you try these, you will never go back.-tastes like French toast!." class="pinImage" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/f3/21/71/f321714268838489912ae8e7ea414627.jpg" /><br />
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2. <a href="http://www.runningwithspoons.com/2014/06/24/banana-oat-greek-yogurt-muffins/">Banana Oat Greek Yogurt Muffins</a> - These are made with no flour or oil, so a healthier version of a muffin. I have made them without chocolate chips and they are pretty good, but I think I like with chocolate chips better. I also will add some walnuts!<br />
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<img alt="Banana Oat Greek Yogurt Muffins -- no flour, no oil, and 100% ridiculously delicious! || runningwithspoons.com" class="aligncenter wp-image-19979" height="320" src="http://www.runningwithspoons.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/06/Banana-Oat-Greek-Yogurt-Muffins.jpg" style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-top: 0px;" title="Banana Oat Greek Yogurt Muffins -- no flour, no oil, and 100% ridiculously delicious! || runningwithspoons.com" width="212" />Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-1371732759095529182015-06-22T11:41:00.000-07:002015-06-22T15:22:33.324-07:00Juicy Boy's MisAdventures<br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">I think one of my favorite things to do in the summer time
is walk my dog.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mainly because I know
how much he LOVES it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is very routine
in our house, after the kids go to bed Juice will start giving me the “please
mom” look. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As soon as I grab his leash
and give it a little jiggle, he is stuck to me like glue and follows me
everywhere in the house till I am ready to go.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Unfortunately, this summer I have been getting annoyed with
other people and their dogs, and one night a couple of weeks ago took the cake
and I came home feeling deflated.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>More
on that to come…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Juice and I have a standard walk that we do.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We are fortunate to live by a lovely creek
with an amazing walking path.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I love it
as most of our walk we don’t have to worry about crossing streets and
driveways.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>However, for some reason
people feel that they should let their dogs go off-leash in the creek.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wish people would realize how dangerous
this could be.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How do you know if my dog
is friendly towards other dogs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Of
course Juice is super friendly, well socialized with other dogs and has never
got into a fight.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>However, my dog is one
tough cookie.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>His toy of choice is a 40
pound rock.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Have you ever seen those
strong man competitions where they flip over the big tires.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That is how Juice plays with his rock.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And, he also has a 100 pound American bulldog
for a girlfriend.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think he could hold his own if he needed
to.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So you get your little chihuahua
off-leash that comes over to my dog and tries to bite Juice, I have no problem
with my dog retaliating.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>However, then
my dog gets the bad wrap because he is a bully breed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">Anyway, we have dog parks, take your dogs there if you want
to go off-leash please.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We have city
bylaws that your dog needs to be on a leash in public – follow it people. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have had multiple encounters with walking
Juice and dogs being off leash, but most dogs are friendly and socialized.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>However, I have had two scary situations now
with other dogs.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The first situation
happened last year.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was walking Juice
and we were in the residential part of our walk.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I look over on the other side of the street,
and there is a big, big Rottweiler.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
Did I mention that he was big? </span>And then I notice he is off-leash and his owner is nowhere to be
seen.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Fantastic! Of course, it had to be
a Rottweiler, couldn’t have be a sweet, innocent little shitzu.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So this dog looks up at us and lets out this
low, strong “woof”.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And starts heading
towards us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was like OMG, this is a
big dog, we might as well call him a bear because he was that big.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I kept walking to not alarm Juice and he
starts following, so I turn around and strongly say “stay” and put my hand
out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And sure shit, the dog
listened.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Halleluiah!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I really didn’t have a backup plan, so glad
that worked. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We got to the end of the
street and the dogs owners had come out to get him.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">After that night, Mark and I discussed what I should do in
the future if we are approached by a dog.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I am glad we talked this through as this helped with my encounter a
couple weeks ago.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So per usual, Juice
and I were on the path.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I always stay to
the far right of the path, and Juice runs on my right in the grass.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That way we aren’t taking up much of the
path, and any leashed dogs we pass on the path are far enough away from Juice
that we can carry on our run undistracted.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>So, we are jogging along and we approach a mom with two little dogs, and
her daughter around 10-12 years old is walking with an English bulldog (on
leash).<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We jog by them, but then the
bulldog decides to lunge at Juice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Since
I am in between them, I get tripped by the bulldog/ bulldogs leash and go
flying into the grass.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Luckily I still
have the leash in my hand, but the girl lost control of her leash when I
tripped on it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The bulldog lunges again
at Juice, and not a nice, please let me smell your butt, but a teeth showing,
biting growling encounter.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think I tried
to kick the bulldog, he lunged at Juice again, then (the pg version) of what I
yelled at the owner was “Control your dog or I am letting go of mine”!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>This is what Mark and I had decided on if we
ever got into this type of situation, and also what they had taught us at
obedience class.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>First, <span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">in this instance, me holding Juice back is
actually causing him to be in an aggressive, defensive state.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I wouldn’t care if the other dog was being <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>controlled by his owner and couldn’t
physically injure Juice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I would hold on
for dear life to him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But that was not
the case, he was in our faces.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Also, I
am not going to give the other dog the advantage and beat up my dog because I
am restraining him.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Luckily, the owner
got ahold of the bulldogs leash and she apologized.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I couldn’t even look at her, I just got up
and continued jogging.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I stopped a bit
later and made sure Juice was ok.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I
actually didn’t start crying till I got home and saw Mark.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Anyway, in this case, the dog was on leash,
but really, bulldogs are strong, a 10 year old should not be walking it if they
can’t control it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Arial;">It just sucks
because I am now a bit paranoid to go out with Juice.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was lucky I wasn’t hurt when I fell down
and lucky Juice wasn’t hurt.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I will
still continue on my adventures with Juice, but I will definitely be more
cautious now.</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-45789873420273964872015-05-11T11:21:00.001-07:002015-05-11T11:21:17.856-07:00Mother's Day 2015<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9aVe-tX_xc9i60yT-Jkg0ZqWDW9IuSDZtoilirVpCN2kl9gc4uH2UkeEzvHCicyUn1a0XaVy61UBnF3tZAusINBhRWCwsvFMbEH99a3HOpMD4qjYXSSjjQf8SbSq_KqUJnsmbW0iW3Awu/s1600/Fruit.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9aVe-tX_xc9i60yT-Jkg0ZqWDW9IuSDZtoilirVpCN2kl9gc4uH2UkeEzvHCicyUn1a0XaVy61UBnF3tZAusINBhRWCwsvFMbEH99a3HOpMD4qjYXSSjjQf8SbSq_KqUJnsmbW0iW3Awu/s320/Fruit.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"></span> <span style="font-family: Calibri;">What a </span><span style="font-family: Calibri;">wonderful Mother’s Day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It started off with waking up to the pitter
patter of little feet coming from downstairs, followed by little giggles.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I peeked open the door and asked if I could
come down, but no I was instructed to stay in bed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So I relaxed, for like a ½ HOUR, my time to
reflect.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Perfect.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was then treated to breakfast in bed, a sweet
homemade card, and a beautiful bracelet.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"> We then headed to the pool for a couple hours.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We have been doing this every Sunday for the past three weeks.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I love it because it is such great
family time, and Mark actually puts down his phone!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Ha ha.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>But we have mainly been pooling it up because the kids are in swimming
lessons and it has been a rough start and they HATE it, but we are making
progress.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<span style="font-family: Calibri;">One of the first families I noticed when we got to the pool
was a young family, the kids were about 2 and 6 months old.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They stood out because the mom didn’t have
any hair and was quite pale.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is
obvious that she is sick.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It made me sad
because she was about my age, if not younger.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I ended up talking to her for a bit because Bentley was obsessed with
her 6 month old. I wished her a happy Mother’s Day, and asked how her day was
going.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Even though she is sick, she had
such a positive attitude and was so full of life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It made me feel sad, it made me feel
inspired, it made me feel lucky.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think
the best way to describe what I was feeling is simply grateful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Grateful for my life, my health, my family.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">After our swim, we had a quick lunch and off to downtown to
meet up with my brother and his girlfriend to celebrate our mom.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We had a lovely but windy walk, I said a
silent prayer to my Angel Mom, then had a speedy ½ mile run with B in my arms
getting her to the bathroom because little one had to PEE.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">In the late afternoon we celebrated another important mom,
that of course being Mark’s mom Wendy.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>We had them over for a barbeque and hopefully she felt loved and
appreciated.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;">It was a truly lovely and busy day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>So blessed to have my two sweet and sassy
munchkins.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My heart is complete!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Calibri;"><o:p></o:p></span> </div>
Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-59772026756728166682014-10-17T11:54:00.003-07:002014-10-17T11:55:54.171-07:00Lifestyle Sistas - Photos of MeMy friend Deena and Christy are part of this series (see picture below) and I thought it would be fun to join in on this one.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBQ0s7YpxBX-JKPfjPZvDKkB89hyphenhyphend8LRfXIq41Nu4729bjI6jJ6mbmy8l-LJ61lh8S22sDW-R0GkWAImlDZTTj6_1jLTnZ0q9-Cysrq9cUBOMBKLt9fLk96C0jwfZL9otkuk146fagRw-D/s1600/linkup.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBQ0s7YpxBX-JKPfjPZvDKkB89hyphenhyphend8LRfXIq41Nu4729bjI6jJ6mbmy8l-LJ61lh8S22sDW-R0GkWAImlDZTTj6_1jLTnZ0q9-Cysrq9cUBOMBKLt9fLk96C0jwfZL9otkuk146fagRw-D/s1600/linkup.jpg" height="319" width="320" /></a></div>
I think this link-up intrigued me because I have been doing a lot of work on my self esteem the last year, learning to be comfortable in my own skin, love what God blessed you with (in my case a bootylisious booty!). This is a lot of work, changing the way you view yourself. It really takes a lot of training your mind to not think so negatively about yourself. I think it will always be a work in progress. However, I believe it is working because as I went through my pictures, I was having a hard time narrowing it down to my top five. No, I am now not conceited, but I am trying to see beauty in myself. So when I look at a picture, I first think of what I like about it, whether it be physical, or emotional. And if I can't come up with anything positive, I just delete it. Anyway, here are my top 5:<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWJITHgL_AN1MafUe-yuT-_vhZMS8ZNxQS6zX3z6Aip8dR0NA4ZnGDE5Np5tbBLPq23tYl5UwCtZs0mSx7qAB-Lf7luG4ljqopY0omtZ93IfOtReBXJOuFBaB_sNB4TSUtRBfMEviXnYpB/s1600/Engagement.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWJITHgL_AN1MafUe-yuT-_vhZMS8ZNxQS6zX3z6Aip8dR0NA4ZnGDE5Np5tbBLPq23tYl5UwCtZs0mSx7qAB-Lf7luG4ljqopY0omtZ93IfOtReBXJOuFBaB_sNB4TSUtRBfMEviXnYpB/s1600/Engagement.jpg" height="320" width="212" /></a></div>
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Our Engagement Session - Pure true love</div>
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Our wedding - I think this pic is so elegant, and I like my butt</div>
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Karter looks so in love with me here!</div>
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My favorite hair day ever!</div>
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I think I look super cute here!</div>
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Me and my sweet girl</div>
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Ok, that's six, not five. Lol. </div>
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Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-75106873314786836872014-08-26T22:08:00.000-07:002014-08-26T22:08:03.429-07:00The Last of the Firsts
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<span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI";"></span> </div>
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<span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI";">A year of
firsts has come to an end tomorrow on the anniversary of your death. First
birthday, Mother's Day, Christmas without you is now behind us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It has been a hard year, but it has also been a year of courage, a year
of growth, reflection and healing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>To
say I am over your death would be a lie, but I am beginning to function with
life without you. On the eve of your death, I feel the urge to write you
a letter.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Here it goes:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="ecxmsonormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 16.2pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI";">Dearest Mom,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="ecxmsonormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 16.2pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI";">I know you have
seen me shed many tears over you this last year. I can’t help it, I miss
you so much. I need to, I need to cry, to feel sad. I still sit here
and can't believe you are gone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think
back to this night a year ago when they called us in to palliative, that you
were dying.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I remember hanging up the
phone in shock.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>How could I be in
shock?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Silly I know, you were in
palliative care, where people go to die.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I think until that moment when I received the phone call I didn't
believe you were dying. I have stuck by and believed in you no matter what you
were battling throughout the years, and this was no different.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I didn't want to stop believing in you and
your power to overcome.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Losing you that
day, that was the hardest day of my life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I pray we
did everything right for you and helped you let go peacefully.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="ecxmsonormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 16.2pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI";">I hope that
you approved of your funeral and felt love from all that attended. I
remember when we started pre-planning your funeral you said you didn’t want one
because no one would come. Boy, did we prove you wrong. I know I
didn’t give a speech, I just couldn’t, I wasn’t strong enough. I hope you
understand.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="ecxmsonormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 16.2pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI";">It was so
hard cleaning out your apartment. I couldn't be in there alone, and even
if Greg made a trip out to the garbage, I had to go with him. Thank you for
giving me guidance as to what you wanted us to do with your belongings once you
passed away. It helped make the process easier knowing you approved with
what we were doing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I hope you felt we
respected you and your belongings. I loved going through all your old pictures
and special trinkits you had kept from your childhood, precious treasures for
us to now cherish forever. Oh, and we found your cigarettes -
busted!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Lol.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="ecxmsonormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 16.2pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI";">A couple
months after you passed, I received a text from our daycare lady. She
said Karter was really sad and she asked him what was wrong, he said even
though he knew you were in heaven and not sick anymore, that he missed you and
started crying. I had been so consumed in my own grief I forgot that
others are grieving too. I apologize for being so wrapped up in myself,
that I didn't comfort and support others as much as I should have.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="ecxmsonormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 16.2pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI";">I was hoping
to somehow feel your presence after you passed. I felt like I needed a
sign that you were ok, or feel some sort of connection to you.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was waiting for some sign to know that you
were around. In the late fall, I was spending a morning making lasagna’s,
chili and pasta sauce. Definitely something you would have come over to
keep me company. At one point, it was like you were there, I opened my
mouth and started to speak to you and turned to the chair at the table where
you would be sitting, but you weren’t there. Even though I physically
couldn’t see you, I could feel your presence.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>It was such a calming feeling, I had the best day after that.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="ecxmsonormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 16.2pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI";">Then, on August
long weekend we were at the cabin, and I went inside to grab Mark and I a
drink. The thought popped into my head “oh, I better check my phone, I am
sure mom has called to check in to see how the weekend is going”. I
rushed to my phone and checked it. But, of course you hadn’t
called. I went outside and shared with Mark what had happened. He
looked up in the sky and said “Aww, hi Grandma Donna”. Literally, a
minute later we had a mishap with the fire in the fire pit, I don’t want to go into
details, but I really believe you were watching over us at that moment and was
our guardian angel, the outcome could have been a lot worse.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="ecxmsonormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 16.2pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI";">I have felt
sorry for myself a lot this year. A common thought was I am too young to
lose my mother. But, this year I have also seen a six year old, and a
nine year old lose their mother. That is just tragic.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have been able to start to transition my
way of thinking from poor me, to how lucky I was to have you in my life for so
long. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="ecxmsonormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 16.2pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI";">I so wish you
could have been at Karter’s first hockey game, I know you would be his biggest
fan. I also know now you have the best seat in the house to watch his
games. But a part of me wants to see you, and see your face light up with
excitement when he scores a goal. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="ecxmsonormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 16.2pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI";">Now that you
are gone I have no idea what is going on in Young and the Restless.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Melayna mentioned we should watch it tomorrow
when we have a celebration in your honor.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="ecxmsonormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 16.2pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.5pt; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI";">In closing,
even thought the year of firsts is over, I will still continue to grieve and
miss you always and forever.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But I will
try my hardest to do it with a smile on my face.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Love you to the moon and back Mom.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Oh, and say hi to Elvis for me!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<o:p><span style="font-family: Calibri;"> </span></o:p></div>
Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-9349836039656854362014-07-16T20:43:00.000-07:002014-07-16T20:43:09.704-07:00The Day I Lost my Mother
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN;">Almost 11 months it has been since we had to
say goodbye.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can't believe it.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I also can't believe it has taken 11 months
to write this post. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have sat down many
times to write, but it is hard.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It is
hard to think about that day.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Don't get
me wrong, I think about it quite often, but to write down all the little
details and consciously go through the entire day - so sad.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But It is important for me to write it,
almost like a tribute to my mom, to write down the details so they will never
be forgotten, to write about the beauty that did occur that day, or maybe even
to help someone going through the same thing.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Well here it goes:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN;">Mom was in palliative care.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The night before she died, Greg and Melayna
were at the hospital and Greg said this is the best day my mom has had in here
so far. She was totally coherent and having conversations. When I
got there she didn't make conversation, but would definitely talk when I spoke
to her. One sad part she said "Aren't you sick of this
already", I replied "mom, there is no other place I would rather
be". She replied "I am tired, so tired".<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I tried to cheer her up sharing some
twizzlers and joking about how hot her male nurse was. I left telling her
I loved her and gave her a gentle hug.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN;"><br />
The hospital called at 2:30am and said if we wanted to be there for her passing
we should come. So Mark's mom rushed over and we ended up getting to the
hospital the same time as my brother and Melayna. I was expecting to walk
into her room and see her resting peacefully like in the movies, but it was
nothing like I imagined it would be. She was moaning, squirming and
throwing her arm up, her eyes were bulging and looking all over. She
seemed very unsettled and scared. I was scared and shocked and couldn't
go close to her, I just melted into Marks arms and cried.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Greg went over and said it's ok mom, we are
here now and gently helped her put down her arm.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span> The nurse came in and gave her some
pain medication, which helped settle her down. I think us being there
helped her as well, she wasn't alone.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>The nurse said she checked her at 2am and she was fine, but came back at
2:30 and it was totally different. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN;">It was still hard to be around her but I
wanted to be strong for her, her eyes were open the whole time and she was just
staring all over, but looking through you, breathing real heavy and making
these sad noises. It was sad that her eyes were open, I think the
nurse could tell it was bothering me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>She said, she is being greeted by loved ones, coming to gather around
her for when she is ready to transition to the other side.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>That is what she is looking at.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She isn't scared.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN;">We just sat there for the longest time
staring at her, then I remembered my mom would not like us doing that, so we
started sharing stories of mom. We had lots of laughs and tears. I
read that their hearing is the last to go, so I hope my mom heard some of our
stories.<br />
<br />
The doctor came around 10:30 and he couldn't believe how quickly she
deteriorated. He said it could be 2 hours or two days, so hard to tell
and that she was in a coma. He also encouraged us to talk to her, that
her hearing is the last to go.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Since we
figured it may be some time before mom passes, Greg and Melayna left to
go let their dog out and Mark went home quickly to get a few things. The
nurses came and bathed her and put on a clean nightgown. After that I had
a good talk with her alone - it was so beautiful for me and I hope it was
for her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I told her how much she is
loved by all, how sorry I was that she couldn't be there to see our kids grow
up, that Grandpa and Grandma were waiting for her, that even though we will
miss her so much it was her time to go, to be at peace and free of pain.
In preparing for my moms passing, I had done some research on what the signs
are that someone is getting ready to pass as well as how to help them pass
peacefully and the way they wish.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had read
that sometimes the dying don't want you to see them take their last breath and
prefer to die alone, so I told her, I am going to the washroom mom, if you want
to die alone, I understand. This is your journey.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I tried to take my time, and when I got back
she was still alive. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-ansi-language: EN;">Greg and Melayna came back and Greg requested
he have some time alone with her and would call/text if anything changed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mark and I went and got a bite to eat in the
hospital cafeteria.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I had my phone on
vibrate and literally didn't take my eyes off it the entire meal.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Mark wanted to phone his sister to see how
the kids were doing so we went outside for a walk, and I put my phone in my
purse.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Yes, I put my phone in my
purse.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don't know if it was the lack
of sleep, but I just sat there dazed listening to Mark talk to his sister.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A couple minutes went by and I realized
"my phone, oh my goodness my phone"!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I immediately grabbed it and there were two texts from Greg and a missed
call, her breathing had changed, come back.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We ran
through the hospital, the elevator ride seemed to take a lifetime, I literally
felt like I was on an episode of Grey's Anatomy, but when we got back to her
room she was already gone. We literally missed it by 10 seconds.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>She passed away at 12:30pm on August 27th.<br />
<br />
The nurse came in and put a beautiful blanket on her, closed her eyes and
crossed her arms. She looked so peaceful. So free of pain. I
believe my mom didn't want me to witness her passing, it was her last gift to me,
but I will write about that in another post.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;">Mark
called the funeral home.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We of course stayed
till they came.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>After they arrived, we
said our goodbyes and I requested that a fuzzy blanket her cousin had brought
my mom stay with her.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>My mom was always
cold, I wanted her to be warm, I know silly.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>We started walking down the hallway.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>When we got to the end of palliative care, ugh, this still brings me to
tears every time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I turned around to
look at her room one last time.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I don't
know what I was expecting to see.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>But
what I did was the funeral attendants were standing outside her door, one on
each side of the door, with their hands together, kind of like how the military
stand at attention.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It just showed such
respect for my mom, for my family.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They
were respecting us and waiting till we left before moving her, even though it
was just her physical body <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>it was such
comfort knowing her body was in such good care.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>I will never forget that image, never.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></span><span lang="EN" style="color: black; font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.5pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN; mso-bidi-font-family: "Segoe UI"; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: Calibri; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-fareast-theme-font: minor-latin;"><br />
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<!--[endif]--></span>Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-31045540140072908762013-07-19T20:55:00.000-07:002013-07-19T20:55:31.756-07:00It's Been AwhileThere is so many things I could talk about, how I started back to work and it is going awesome, how my little girl is getting so darn big, how awesome my son is, but today was a tough day and I need to vent.<br />
<br />
I took my mom to get her CT scan results today. We both had a bad feeling going into the appointment. I was worried with the horrible upper back pain she has been having that the cancer was now in her bones. But, the doctor never mentioned anything about the cancer spreading so that was good. However, the tumor in her lung has doubled in size since her last CT scan in April. So it has grown from 3cm to 6cm's in less then three months. This means the cancer is no longer in remission.<br />
<br />
The doc gave her two options. He said he was in a hard place because he could not recommend a high dose chemo due to my mom having such a bad reaction to it. So option one is to provide a low dosage chemo. This will not shrink the tumor but hopefully slow it down. Option two was palliative care which means letting the cancer take it's course and they will provide her with drugs to keep her comfortable as well as emotional support. I was not looking forward to this day because my mom has been firm in not doing any more chemo. I can't blame her, she had such a horrible previous experience. But, to my surprise this old lady still has some fight left in her and has decided to go ahead with the treatments. Her exact words were "Well, I really don't have anything else going on in my day". Lol. <br />
<br />
I am so proud of my mom that she wants to continue to fight. The doctor did say if it gets to be so much she can stop at any time, so I think there is comfort in that.<br />
<br />
I tried to stay strong and not cry. I had to wheel her to go get an x-ray, so while she was getting that done I had a quick cry. Of course, at that moment one of Mark's friends girlfriends came around the corner. I felt so stupid, I was a sobbing mess, but whatever she understood. <br />
<br />
While we were waiting to see the doctor, there was a little girl around eight with a pic line in. My mom said that it really bothers her to see kids with cancer. At least she has lived her life. My mom said she has even seen a two month old with cancer in the clinic. Anyway, the little girl went in to get treatment. When she came out she was so proud to show off the stickers she got to her brother. Then she said, "I didn't forget about you brother, I got you a chocolate bar". It just touched my heart that this little girl is going through cancer and she still thought about her brother.<br />
<br />
This afternoon I talked to my dad who earlier this week had 2 liters of fluid drained from in between his lung and ribs. He got a CT scan done as well. The doctor called him in today and they drained almost another two liters! His CT scan showed some abnormalities in some lymph nodes. They are going to wait for the results from the fluid but the doctor said it could be a virus or lymphoma and that he was leaning towards lymphoma. He will have to get a biopsy done to confirm this though. At least if it is cancer this type is quite treatable, so I am not freaking out. <br />
<br />
So yes, this was a crappy day. As I sit her writing this, I am sipping on a big f*cking alcoholic beverage. And surprisingly, or not, I am starting to feel a bit better ;)Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-61691850994235361922013-03-01T09:48:00.002-08:002013-03-01T09:48:38.068-08:00Sorry Candace - I Had ToWe were that cool back in the day. Enough said.<br />
<br />
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Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-70966298755835731162013-02-21T21:11:00.002-08:002013-02-21T21:11:08.328-08:00Ups and DownsI have been meaning to blog a lot more about our journey of my mom and her cancer. I am not sure why I haven't - lack of time - depressing - but I feel it is time I need to give an update/vent. <br />
<br />
First - my mom has been nothing but courageous with her battle. She underwent chemo and radiation. I will never forget when she started losing her hair. It was coming out in chunks and I remember her calling me crying, saying she looked hidious. So we decided it was time to shave her head. It was a sad day, one I will never forget - May long weekend. As hard as that moment was for her and for me, I was so honored to be there and proud of my mom. I couldn't shave it, so Marks mom came over. We all cried but it was empowering. I made sure to tell my mom how beautiful she looked with a shaved head. And - I meant it!<br />
<br />
She felt like a rockstar for the most of the treatments. She was given the max doses for chemo and radiation. At the end of her radiation treatments she really went down hill. So much so that at one of her cancer appointments at the beginning of August her levels were all messed up that she was admitted into the hospital where she stayed for three weeks. I was surprised and taken back by this. I had no idea my mom was so sick from the treatments. I felt like a bad daughter for not noticing. I know I was preoccupied with a two month old, but I still felt like an idiot. My mom later told me that on the second night in the hospital she woke up and "saw the light", but said "no way, it is not my time yet". It was hard juggling a baby and getting in daily hospital visits. I couldn't stay for long, I felt like I wasn't doing enough. I tried to accomodate by buying the hospital cable tv for her and bringing the paper/magazines. It is hard being stuck - I want to be with my mom - but I have this young family that is relying on me. I know my mom appreciated all I could do for her at the time. At this point the tumor had shrunk dramatically and there was no sign of the cancer anywhere else.<br />
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When she got out of the hospital she had some of her energy back. She was still weaker and naseated but could still make us home made buns/cinnamon buns/rice crispy cake, so I knew she was ok. Ha ha. <br />
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The following months were ok. Her scans were good. I was nervous for the one in December because I wanted Christmas to be a positive experience for us all. And it was. The tumor was pretty much gone! <br />
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But the nasea never did go away and the energy never came back full throttle. My mom was discouraged with not feeling great and expressed this to her doctor. He made the point that she did almost die and it takes a long time to recover from that. So I think she felt not the best, but was hopeful that she would recover. <br />
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Then came January. My mom called me and said she thought she had a stroke. Her left side was numb and her leg was not functioning good. It was like it was asleep. My brother and I took her to the walk in clinic and after the doctor heard her story he thought it had spread to her brain. Very crappy news. Another weird symptom was that it was taking her a long time to urinate. She was pretty much wheelchair bound for the next couple weeks. When we got in to see the cancer doctor he was upset that tests had not been done sooner. That day they did an ultrasound on her kidneys - they were concerned they were failing. Luckily, that came out good. They did a ct scan and that looked good also. So the last step was an MRI of her spine. A couple days later she went in to get her results. I honestly thought they were going to be positive results, so I felt that I did not need to go with her and she got a ride from the cancer center volunteers. But, our luck had run out and there are multiple spots on her upper spine close to her neck. What a regret not being there with her. I would hate to hear that news by myself. <br />
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So the next step is my mom gets monthly injections to strengthen her bones. I think she gets a ct scan in about a months time and then chemo and possibly radiation. My mom is pretty upset about this and as of now told me she is refusing treatment. God - what do you say. I want to scream at her fight, fight. You have to, for me, for Greg, for Karter, and Bentley. But then I see how much she has struggled since treatment. I understand quality of life, being sick isn't much quality. But she is still alive! I just don't know what to do. I have talked to her trying to be encouraging, saying that they would not be giving you as much chemo/radiation this time. I think she is waiting to see what the cancer doctors say. As in, time span for if she does treatment vs refuses treatment. <br />
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I wanted to end on a positive note. The support I have received from friends and family has really touched my heart. I know with my friends I have not talked a lot about my feelings - but that said I know I could call anyone of them up and they would lift me up. Mark, of course, is wonderful. He is very encouraging and there to give me a hug and smile whenever I need it. Marks parents are truly a blessing in my life. Wendy is one of the most caring and thoughtful people I know. Whether it is shaving my moms head, taking care of the kids so I can take my mom to appointments, giving my mom magazines, or just listening to me, she is there. She even makes meals for my mom and freezes them so she does not have to cook. She has enough on her plate with her very close sister who is very sick with cancer - but still thinks about my mom. What a lady. When I say that I hit the jackpot marrying into Marks family I mean it. Anyway, love you all and goodnight!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDQvHBJ_JV15wxN2FVbNYoazxB5BWT2bmRefttraJrPAU7w4wKCnazFkfXSt_Ld9ed8S0p-IxL7SMYaytELBA5tAVxmaP7N7Y4s8WmezKVYIuBXX_M77mYXnE8wdzMnbmhui1cNlCoQJUu/s1600/Oldies+but+goodies+007.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDQvHBJ_JV15wxN2FVbNYoazxB5BWT2bmRefttraJrPAU7w4wKCnazFkfXSt_Ld9ed8S0p-IxL7SMYaytELBA5tAVxmaP7N7Y4s8WmezKVYIuBXX_M77mYXnE8wdzMnbmhui1cNlCoQJUu/s320/Oldies+but+goodies+007.JPG" width="239" /></a> Mom, Karter and Bentley</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKTPHONIns3SiD_Ietsi8v7Dt_gbcqE21vdG_54OpFhi3F2U-jp3a1_F_lHSi9RUzPQLPW9jDIF2zfLa1fLOiLCU-39aVqxwCtSbGKnbarAEAtx0kV9Otil8iyhA_UeXmJjtPJif66U0Bn/s1600/Oldies+but+goodies+024.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="218" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKTPHONIns3SiD_Ietsi8v7Dt_gbcqE21vdG_54OpFhi3F2U-jp3a1_F_lHSi9RUzPQLPW9jDIF2zfLa1fLOiLCU-39aVqxwCtSbGKnbarAEAtx0kV9Otil8iyhA_UeXmJjtPJif66U0Bn/s320/Oldies+but+goodies+024.JPG" width="320" /></a>My mom and godmother. I love old pictures</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiK5g4qQybeH7JIp3knyiwktvbE-O1rflq7wLFdt9HkYM0iAiD0rkT8ZQl1kYRlIlkHFjVb9EpeuxhJwMxG_hbIacO3q-D889y0xx26Hxm2Gs1SajwFDMioKcUyvHOv3UB1cUVg9PaXdbhR/s1600/Oldies+but+goodies+026.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="239" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiK5g4qQybeH7JIp3knyiwktvbE-O1rflq7wLFdt9HkYM0iAiD0rkT8ZQl1kYRlIlkHFjVb9EpeuxhJwMxG_hbIacO3q-D889y0xx26Hxm2Gs1SajwFDMioKcUyvHOv3UB1cUVg9PaXdbhR/s320/Oldies+but+goodies+026.JPG" width="320" /></a> Oh she was smokin' back in the day!</div>
Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-2538669180258979742013-02-14T11:32:00.001-08:002013-02-14T11:32:41.507-08:00Happy Valentine's DaySean: "Bentley, will you accept this rose?"<br />
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Bentley: "Why yes Sean, I will!".<br />
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I can only dream that my little girl will end up with a great guy like Bachelor Sean. <br />
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Oh, and with a guy as wonderful as her daddy too!Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-87066774480220232392013-02-07T19:51:00.002-08:002013-02-07T20:05:18.630-08:00Karter's 4th Birthday PartyWe celebrated Karter's 4th birthday last weekend. It was a pool party and we rented a room at the Lakewood Civic Center before we went swimming. Karter requested a dinosaur themed party this year. I turned to pinterest to get some crafty ideas and of course I was overwhelmed with the options. I chose to keep it simple, for the most part, and cost friendly as I am on a pretty tight budget these days. What I loved is that Karter appreciated all our efforts and he did not stop smiling the entire party. We made a dinosaur dig out of an inflatable pool and filled it with shredded paper. We used Easter eggs and put mini dinosaurs inside. My other favorite pinterest steal was paper mache dinosaur eggs for treat bags. We filled them with dinosaur related items. It took a long time, but was so worth it.<br />
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A couple weeks before the party, Karter met my friend Danika's neice Roxy and pretty much fell in love with her right then and there. He kept asking me to invite her to his birthday party so of course I did. The funny thing though is that he also wanted to invite his girlfriend Melanie from daycare. When Mark was driving Karter to daycare he told him that he had an invitation for Melanie. I guess Karter got all concerned and said "but Dad, I am only suppose to have one girlfriend at my birthday party". Oh what a ladies man. Unfortunately Melanie was unable to make it but it may have been for the best as Karter was all about Roxy. Showing her around the party and sitting by her. They did not leave each others side while swimming. It was pretty cute. <br />
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I was showing Karter pictures of his party and there is a pic of Roxy with an apple juice in front of her. Karter pipes up "Oh My Goodness, I did not know Roxy likes apple juice". His expression was like he discovered the moon. This week Karter and Mark dug some snow tunnels in the front yard. Karter said he would like to take Roxy on a date in his tunnels. Like I really don't know where this kid picks this stuff up!<br />
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Thanks to everyone who was able to attend Karter's party. It is so nice to have so much love and support for our little man.<br />
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I also have to throw out there that this was the first time I sported a bikini since Bentley was born. And I looked dino-myte. Lol.<br />
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Here are some pictures from the party.<br />
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Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-24703442475247107412013-02-05T19:32:00.001-08:002013-02-05T19:41:51.249-08:00Would You?My son tends to be on the shy side when it comes to other kids. It can even get to be a bit awkward. Lol. Well depends on the day. Anyway, he takes after his mother in the way that I am completely timid in a new environment until I feel comfortable. This was one of the biggest reasons why I wanted to put him into preschool starting this fall. We figured this would be an easier transition than sending him straight to kindergarten. He will get into the school routine, there is <strong><em>no recess</em></strong>, and he will not be friendless on the first day of kindergarten. Easy breezy decision. However, the registration process - not so much!<br />
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Multiple co-workers of mine that live in the same area as us have shared their preschool registration experience. This included on the day of registration lining up at 3am OUTSIDE to ensure their child got a spot. Now remember, registration is at the end of February for this particular school! If you showed up after 5 or 6 am you did not get a spot - I guess registration starts at 10am. This registration process is in the public school and aparently the teacher is amazing. The reason for such few spots is that if your child has attended before the younger siblings are grandfathered in. Anyway, Karter will be going to the Catholic school next door. This is the second year they were offering preschool. So I had no idea what to do the day of registration which was at 9:30am. 3am, 5am, 6am??? I knew that it was so important to Mark and I to get a spot for Karter. We truly believe he will benefit tremendously ... so we decided to suck it up - it is for our son. Of course - Mark would be the one standing in line so it made my decision easier. Registration was February 1st. <br />
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I felt bad for Mark looking at the weather forecast, as last week was freezing! I poked fun at it, but then it ended up biting me in the butt. Mark ended up having a Kinsmen function Thursday night, two home inspections booked for Friday and another Kinsmen function Friday night, so guess who ended up having to go stand in line. F&ck. I decided 6am would be a good time to go. I had packed my winter boots, skipants, hat, mitts, and a blanket the night before. In the am I anxiously pulled up to the school and .... no one was there! I was pumped, well kind of. I went to Tim Hortons and got a coffee, came home for a bit, did a couple school drivebys, then headed back to the school to stay put at 7:45. <br />
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I was first in line, and a girl followed me in and the line grew from there - oh - and we got to wait INSIDE the school. Catholics are so thoughtful ;) It was posted on the door that there were only 13 spots! I ended up chatting with the girl behind me and I think her son and Karter are going to be best friends. They sound so similar and ended up in the same class. I was so frickn' pumped when I registered him! I had to bring back his health card for them to photocopy and I asked Karter if he wanted to go meet his teachers. Once it registered he was so excited. He quickly drew a couple pics for them and off to the school we went. He was mesmerized by his classroom. It was pretty cute and he chatted up his teachers. It was kind of awkward though as the parents registering by this point were being put on a wait list as the classrooms were full. <br />
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So for now I am on cloud nine that he will be attending school next year. I am sure in August it was be a whold other story as I will have to watch my sweet little boy go off into the real world.Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-11014836713826104992012-12-19T10:12:00.001-08:002012-12-19T20:01:37.211-08:00A Christmas PromiseBaby's first Christmas ... such a special occasion. I have been thinking alot about how to make this Christmas special for Bentley. After a lot of reflecting, I have come to this conclusion. No matter how many presents you receive or how many lights there are on the tree, you will not remember this Christmas. I think the special gift we can give you this year is a Christmas promise ... a promise for all the Christmas's to come:<br />
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Bentley, we promise to teach you the true meaning of Christmas. To take you to church where you can go to Sunday school, where you can fill your heart with the love of the Lord and fill our fridge with colored pictures of him. We promise to teach you that the star on top of our tree represents a heavenly promise of long ago. That the Christmas wreath hanging outside our door symbolizes that love is one continuous round of affection. The candy canes we hang on our Christmas tree represents the shepherds' crook and that we are our brother's keeper. And that our Santa Claus is a symbol of generosity and good.<br />
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When I think of Christmas the thoughts that overwhelm me are that of family. No matter how many presents you have under the tree, if you have no one to share them with, they are worthless. The last couple days I keep thinking about the poor families that lost their little ones last Friday. How many of those families already had presents wrapped under the tree dreaming of their beautiful children excitedly opening them on Christmas morning. And now they have no one to open them. Breaks my heart and is just a reminder to keep things in perspective. Bentley, we promise we will fill each and every Christmas day with the love and joy of our family.<br />
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Love always, <br />
Mommy, Daddy & Karter Blain.<br />
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Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-53614546628170128172012-12-16T08:08:00.000-08:002012-12-16T08:08:50.581-08:00Oh Christmas TreeWhat is Christmas without a Christmas tree? To me a Christmas tree symbolizes family, tradition and memories. There are so many decorations that have such sentimental value to me. Some from when I was a little girl, some from Karter's first Christmas and the family we continue to build. <br />
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I remember as a young girl going out with my father into the woods to find that perfect tree. I remember the excitement of finding the "perfect one", then to look down and realize it had two stumps :( As you will see below, we definitely settled for second best. <br />
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It has been fun for me to look back at these pictures and the trees and traditions. Starting out with real trees, the traditional tinsel, candy cane and circle balls. Really, decorations have not evolved that much over the years. Then looking at my tree, pre-children. It was perfect, everything matched and placed proportionately - the tree being a Walmart special. Then, enter Mark and two kids later, the tradition has shifted back to a real tree stuffed with mismatched decorations and touching memories. To me, this is now our perfect tree.<br />
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Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-8140501327440474232012-12-12T12:31:00.001-08:002012-12-12T12:31:53.501-08:00Ho Ho Ho Santa Is In Town<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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One of my favorite Christmas traditions is getting a picture taken with Santa. Surprisingly, for how SHY Karter is, he has never cried or made shy with Santa. Last year he even got some cuddle time in. I also like going to Santa because I know what Karter tells him that he wants for Christmas is for sure his top favorite on the list. This year Karter said he wants "How to Tame your Dragon" movie. <br />
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And of course this was a special visit as this is Bentley's first time meeting Santa. She did good, she really didn't care and let her brother get all the attention.Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-4405756707687273852012-09-29T21:24:00.001-07:002012-09-29T21:25:23.584-07:00Karter's Room<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBEuNl8i-Vxm2FqyUPc90m9KPneUtoWVAc6FFP1uLfuiVm3N0ohf1NN_5MiRg50kRzzNlF7lFXg5A8cGyLXdrQhZJHs9eRLxN8dn7liFQR-E8TCvZvIQ7aiHUjifgyHU0fuMSEturp6ufq/s1600/Summer+2012+051.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBEuNl8i-Vxm2FqyUPc90m9KPneUtoWVAc6FFP1uLfuiVm3N0ohf1NN_5MiRg50kRzzNlF7lFXg5A8cGyLXdrQhZJHs9eRLxN8dn7liFQR-E8TCvZvIQ7aiHUjifgyHU0fuMSEturp6ufq/s320/Summer+2012+051.JPG" width="180" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgA1QODt2FVRDGADXfqRr98BUHiq-lz1XqsFYjSJglJUo60vyhA_o20YqPZ5tSK6eAnt0LD3ZJKtQQHlURQ3tVtdcqoP2S8-eJ3uBd9CdJ6R45OUoAo_XEgCWZgskjBpR5dRk2oQ80wb-mf/s1600/Summer+2012+040.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgA1QODt2FVRDGADXfqRr98BUHiq-lz1XqsFYjSJglJUo60vyhA_o20YqPZ5tSK6eAnt0LD3ZJKtQQHlURQ3tVtdcqoP2S8-eJ3uBd9CdJ6R45OUoAo_XEgCWZgskjBpR5dRk2oQ80wb-mf/s320/Summer+2012+040.JPG" width="180" /></a></div>
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We gave Karter's room a make-over the same time we did Bentley's room. Obviously it is sports theme. We chose this as it is a theme that Karter will enjoy for years and was fitting for a big boy room. My favorite part of the room is the signed roughrider onsie. It was his first jersey and the tickets were for his first game he attended with Daddy. <br />
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I love how proud Karter is of his room and quite often he will show whoever comes over his room. Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-27874543178485079302012-09-28T15:14:00.002-07:002012-09-28T15:14:37.739-07:00The Party you Never Want to PlanIt is hard when one of your parents has a terminal illness. I think it is even harder when they are single. The children have to step up and I find I have taken on a lot of the worries, resposibilities and stresses that the spouse would normally have. Such things as taking my mom to appointments, making sure she has her medication, cleaning her house when she is sick. Making sure she is not alone for too long so that she does not get depressed and taking care of her when she is sick. I gladly sign up for these responsibilities but it does wear on a person after awhile. <br />
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Another responsibility that the children have is planning a funeral. This has been on my mind a lot since my mom got sick. We discussed it briefly, but found that my mom, brother and I were not on the same page. I discussed this with Mark and we left it at that.<br />
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Then one day Mark came home from one of his business networking meetings and that morning a lady from Hillcrest Memorial had given a presentation about pre-planning your funeral. Mark said that there are so many options available and we should meet with her. I thought this was a good idea.<br />
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I had a hard time bringing it up with my mom and bro that we should meet her. I think because it is awkward and not fun and the realization that this is going to happen. However, the spin on it is that my mom is currently healthy and I would rather make arrangements now as to when she is on her death bed and we are all super emotional. Plus, then we could make arrangements that we all could be comfortable with.<br />
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The meeting went really well. No one cried! I was close when we went into the room where you view the body and they were explaining how sometime you use the bed that was on display because children are not as scared to see someone lying in a bed as opposed to a coffin. I instantly thought of Karter and it made me really, really sad, but I pushed through. <br />
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After that they took us to the celebration room. All three of us instantly felt relaxed. As this is what my mom wants is a celebration not a funeral. It is a beautiful, welcoming room. <br />
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Overall it was the best experience that it could have been. The staff are awesome and the grounds are breathtaking. It made it all worth it when my mom said "I feel at peace here".<br />
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This experience has definitely made me think about pre-planning my own funeral. I don't want my family to think "well, would she have wanted to be buried or cremated", a church funeral or celebration. There is enough emotion going on that it will be nice that it is all planned out in advance. That was one of the things they said also is that people spend more when things aren't planned out in advance. And I don't want my family to have to worry about the cost. The nice thing about pre-arranging is that you can lock in the costs now of the funeral service and burial site and make payments as small as $50/month. <br />
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My grandmothers funeral was pre-arranged and it was so nice for the family not to have to make all the arrangements and we could just grieve and remember her. And there was comfort in knowing this is what she wanted.<br />
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Anyway, enough about the hard stuff. Have a good weekend :)<br />
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Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-32540520885461471782012-09-12T09:33:00.000-07:002012-09-12T09:33:00.136-07:00My Purple People Eater and My Romeo<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<u>My Purple People Eater</u><br />
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My little girl has been fighting thrush for over a month now. After two failed tries we are on to the purple violet treatment. Good news is that it looks like it has cleared up, but we still have five more days of treatments to go. Bad news is that this stuff stains everything - so you can imagine what this breastfeeding mom looks like. I have to be very careful with her clothes and since majority of Bentley's clothes are borrowed that really limits what she can wear. I will be happy when we can say good bye to this purple dye and thrush and hello to cute colorful outfits once again.<br />
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<u>My Romeo</u><br />
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Karter has a soft spot for the ladies. When he was two years old he declared Strawberry Short Cake his girlfriend and would let everyone know that was his girl. He has since moved on to Layla a little girl from daycare. Like his daddy, he loves the older ladies. But, since Layla has started school and is only around occasionally, he has moved on to his new girlfriend Melanie. I never thought much of him calling these girls his girlfriend, like he really knew what that meant. Then one day I picked Karter up at daycare and he went to say good-bye to Melanie, which included a hug and an "I Love You". I was shocked and looked at Bonnie his daycare provider. She said "I know, he is a real Romeo". Moving on to yesterday they went to the fun factory. Bonnie said that Karter barely went on the slides or ball pitt. He was too busy sitting driver in the fire truck giving a ride to all the ladies. At one point he even had six girls in there. Bonnie jokingly mentioned we may have trouble with Karter. Since I don't have any pictures of Karter and his ladies - here he is with the two most important ladies in his life.<br />
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Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-5477327471447552572012-07-05T21:32:00.002-07:002012-07-05T21:34:19.968-07:00Bentley's Room<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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We finished the final touches on Bentley's room last week. I could not be happier with her room and I hope she loves it as much as we do.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMPboek7fdyXQMbhjNi7ptC9_HtmePOalwmPLyuH6Gq4qMTrbeDDxqb4lqC-_ut_LZgIjnjbcTIXALRUTdxnJNes48aZ1XvFc1lxPl84aVLZ2TyjmtbPMjkw6ZX36pOu1oqJ2XCsKLjMy2/s1600/photo11.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="239" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMPboek7fdyXQMbhjNi7ptC9_HtmePOalwmPLyuH6Gq4qMTrbeDDxqb4lqC-_ut_LZgIjnjbcTIXALRUTdxnJNes48aZ1XvFc1lxPl84aVLZ2TyjmtbPMjkw6ZX36pOu1oqJ2XCsKLjMy2/s320/photo11.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-15902853258245712662012-06-03T09:31:00.000-07:002012-06-03T09:31:14.788-07:00Our Week in Photos<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSZ94VpdCNiV_BXB3bIgW1NK53QINRR25TCmadNZFReAol6jrJ3iOEsy-WySx0S0EM9RPlKPf63yWCIfltQwvrMazJN4vLG8hqcKny4kN1cSXD-MYqe9XyTkkS9iaXquCB2ZZwdtw9oldB/s1600/photo+(8).JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSZ94VpdCNiV_BXB3bIgW1NK53QINRR25TCmadNZFReAol6jrJ3iOEsy-WySx0S0EM9RPlKPf63yWCIfltQwvrMazJN4vLG8hqcKny4kN1cSXD-MYqe9XyTkkS9iaXquCB2ZZwdtw9oldB/s320/photo+(8).JPG" width="239" /></a></div>Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-26104940107225083102012-04-19T08:17:00.003-07:002012-04-19T08:59:56.109-07:00Radiologist AppointmentMy mom and I met with the radiologist yesterday. It was a very informative appointment that lasted 2.5 hours! I was amazed by how he just pulls up the bone scan and CT scans (which are videos) on his computer so that we all can see the tumor and whatever else is going on. He provided so much detail in his explanations and had a great bed side manner. My mom and I were very impressed. So right now we are at the stage where we have a lot of answers but are waiting for the MRI next week which is the last piece of the puzzle - but probably the most important piece. <br /><br />I have been doing some research on lung cancer since the first CT scan my mom had. That is the type of person I am and it helps me find comfort in information and come to terms with reality. OK - so there are two types of lung cancer - small cell and non-small cell. Majority of patients, approx. 75% have non-small cell. I took the assumption that this would be the case for my mom and did most of my research on non-small cell. So when the doctor said she had small cell lung cancer it literally shocked me and I burst into tears. (which sucked bc I was suppose to be there to support my mom!!) Anyway, what I knew about small cell is that it grows and spreads very rapidly. After I pulled myself together (f*ck), the doctor carried on to say that yes it is aggressive, but responds much better to chemo and radiation then non-small cell. Surgery is almost never a treatment option with small cell - which is not an option in my moms case.<br /><br />We then looked at my mom's bone scan. Again this has been a concern due to the extensive pain she has had for years in her back. From what the doctor could tell it appeared that the cancer has not spread to the bones. Yeah. However, we will have to wait for the specialist to confirm this.<br /><br />We looked at the CT scan which showed us the tumor in the lung and how it has grown since her last CT scan a couple months ago. He also mentioned that the CT scan did not show any tumors growing in her brain.<br /><br />The doctor concluded that he believes the cancer is limited to her lung. All the medical procedures we have done so far come to this conclusion. However, we still need the MRI because this brain scan is more detailed than the CT and would catch smaller cancer cells or tumors.<br /><br />After this we discussed treatment options. There is the standard treatment for this type of cancer or else there is a clinical trial. Both involve chemotherapy and radiation, with the clinical trial being a bit more aggressive with radiation (she would get it twice a day as opposed to once a day). After radiation on the lung he would do radiation on the brain. I was confused by this and asked "so whether it is or is not in her brain, you would be doing radiation on the brain". Shock number 2 - he said no - if it is in her brain there will be no treatment for her at all!! There is pretty much nothing they can do. F*ck! My heart sank again. Who would have thought I would be praying for the chance for my mom to have chemo and radiation! <br /><br />After the Radiologist left we talked with the RN about the clinical trial some more. My mom is interested in doing this as it may help another patient down the road. And really - why not do it.<br /><br />So we finish the appointment and are walking out the door when the RN comes running down the hall and tells us the radiologist wanted to talk to us again. Boom - heart sinks again. We go back in the room and he tells us that he was looking more at the CT scan and there is fluid present around the heart. Everyone has this fluid but it should not be showing up on a CT scan. This fluid has also increased a little bit from her first CT scan. Is it cancer - can't tell. Unfortunately though - it may eliminate us from the clinical trial. But - they would still continue on with the standard treatment in which the chemo could eliminate it. <br /><br />When we got home my mom and Karter were playing outside and I ran to the computer to determine survival rates. If it is limited to her lung the average life expectancy is two years. So what this means is that with treatment, 50% of these patients are living two years after being diagnosed. If the cancer has spread to her brain and she will not be eligible for treatment, the average life expectancy is 2-4 months! I decided not to share this info with my mom. She is in pretty good spirits and believes that it is limited to her lung - which I do as well.<br /><br />I had a breakdown when Mark walked in the door. I was happy my mom and K were still outside. I needed a couple minutes to let down my guard and crumble. I literally melted into his arms. He is a great support!Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-90521824151091263332012-04-03T13:48:00.003-07:002012-04-03T13:52:39.250-07:00Finally a Bit of an AnswerDoctor called today and confirmed that it is lung cancer. All he said was that treatment would be chemo and radiation and that the Cancer Clinic would be in touch with my mom. She seemed pretty good when I talked to her, I think she was focusing on how much she dislikes her doctor to let it sink in that she does have cancer. <br /><br />So she has no idea on what stage she is or anything, just that it is cancer. I guess we will just have to wait and meet with the cancer doctor to find out exactly what is going on. I am still being optimistic in the fact that the PET scan did not show it spreading and that it was not in her lymphnodes. But again, we will have to wait and see what the doctor says.Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-472415939124580300.post-51622799996445529082012-03-29T08:11:00.002-07:002012-03-29T08:30:44.117-07:00Lesson LearnedMark had to go into work for 6:30am today. This switched up our routine as he always drops off Karter at daycare and I do the pick up. Not a big deal. I quite enjoyed getting Karter ready and we were ready to go by 8am and set the alarm and out the door we went. <br /><br />When I got to work at 8:30 I had a voicemail from Mark to call him. Oh crap, what did I do...<br /><br />I called him back and asked him how things were going. He said good, just finished doing a walk through. I assumed he meant on a work house, but no, he meant on our house. And the walkthrough was with the police. <br /><br />So this obviously was the first time I have set the alarm during the day since we got our dog Juice. You have two options and I picked the wrong one and Juice set off the motion detectors. <br /><br />We all know how much I check my cell phone and it could have no battery life for days and I would not have noticed. Well my phone was on vibrate and I had a couple missed calls from the alarm company and from Mark. Woops!<br /><br />Since they could not get ahold of me they sent the police to our house. They did then get ahold of Mark and when he arrived home the police were checking out our back yard. She insisted that they go into the house and go through every room to ensure no one was inside. Lol. Mark is NOT a big fan of police so you could imagine how happy he was with me.<br /><br />Lessons learnt from this experience - I now know what button to press on our alarm system so the dog does not trip it. And the second lesson - take my phone off vibrate!!Alynnehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13348193943642729847noreply@blogger.com0